This is a view of the LOOONNNNG line we had to stand in. Wave hello to Boba Fett! Me, posing with someone dressed as a Sith Lord. Melinda (Lace Mindu) posing with the same guy. There were many fans in costumes, some of which were very authentic looking.

I had such a great time at this event that I'm really looking forward to the next one. There were some problems with IMMENSELY long lines and poor planning on the part of the event's organizers; but overall, it was fun. The following is the diary I kept while I was there. You can click on any picture to see the full-size image in a new window.

Thursday, May 2, 2002

The first day was rather uneventful. The bus trip took seven hours and was quite miserable. You’d think the Greyhound buses would have more comfortable seats, considering that people spend hours and hours sitting in them. My back was hurting by the end of the ride. I brought a book to read, but spent most of the time sleeping, as I didn’t get much sleep the night before. But sleeping in transit is not the same as sleeping in a bed. One never goes completely to sleep--the hearing still functions very well and I was aware of noises, so I wasn’t well-rested at all.

Arrived at the station and tried to call Lace Mindu (Melinda is her real name) on her cell phone, but couldn’t get a response. She’s the one with whom I would be sharing a room at Quality Inn. Eventually, though, she did arrive, we hugged, and hit it off quite well from the start. We went straight to Circle Center Mall to meet up with others from www.Nightly.net who said they would be coming. Number Six, Jedi Cool, the Maker, Ryn, Lady Palpatine, Mandard, Jedi Prince, Anakin’s Angel, and Lost in Coruscant all showed up but several others didn’t make it. It was great to finally meet up with all these people whom I’ve only ever known over the Internet. (My screen name at Nightly is Chalcedony, by the way.)

I wore my homemade T-shirt that’s red with an evil, grinning smiley on the front and the words “Creepy Girl” on the back in weird lettering (It‘s sort of a nickname, you see). I’d promised to wear it for easy identification. We sat and babbled for a long time, bought tickets for the Spider-Man movie, made our own cool buttons using Lost in Coruscant’s button-making kit, and attempted to eat some of the “food” at the food court. Mostly, we just got to know each other a bit then went to our hotels. I slept like a rock that night.

	Behold, the Nightly gang! Another group shot. Number Six has a meaningful discussion with Yoda on the finer points of jiu jitsu. George Lucas' look-alike dressed as a Rebel pilot.

Friday, May 3

When we arrived at the Convention Center, the line to get in was blocks long. It wrapped all the way around the dome and down the street, thousands of people all talking and laughing and making friends and sharing stories. I actually didn’t mind the wait because I was so happy just to be there. Many people wore costumes, some of which were beautifully detailed and very authentic looking. I saw Jedi Knights, Sith Lords, Darth Vaders, Rebel soldiers and Stormtroopers and TIE fighter pilots and numerous Amidala outfits. I wish I’d had time to make a costume. I’m planning already to attend the next Celebration, so by then I should have one very Vaderish outfit prepared!

It took about 2 1⁄2 hours to get through the line. I had a great time just talking to all these people I’d never met before about Star Wars. And then we were in! And there was another line to get our lanyards and passes before we could finally get to do stuff. Melinda and I made arrangements to meet somewhere, then we split up to do our own things.

My first impression was one of disbelief and wonder as I entered the main exhibit hall. There were vendors selling all kinds of Star Wars collectibles and T-shirts and posters and toys. One vendor was selling authentic swords, knives, daggers, battle axes and other Medieval gear, which was very strange--everyone’s costumes were checked so that nobody had any real weapons, yet here were people selling very dangerous weapons that you could buy and then carry around with you as you did the rest of your shopping! I was tempted to buy a particularly evil-looking dagger, but decided it might be a problem if Greyhound security conducted a random baggage check.

After gawking like an idiotic tourist for awhile, I headed over to the autograph area to hunt down Dave Prowse so he could sign my Lego set. It contains Darth Vader and Palpatine--only Lego could make Vader look cute! So I got there, and you had to buy autograph coupons at $15 apiece or ten for $120. I bought three, again having to wait in an enormous queue to get there. Then yet ANOTHER line led to Dave’s table. Big star of the day, however, was Billy Dee Williams, so people were mostly waiting to get his autograph. You know, after all these years, he’s still incredibly handsome!

It took about 45 minutes to get to Dave’s table. I told him that I’m a regular contributor to his message board, where I post under the name of Sable. He said, “Oh, so YOU’RE Sable! We finally get to meet!” Apparently, he does read the messages, although I’m sure he simply doesn’t have time to post any of his own. I informed him that I had promised to get photos of us together, so I handed my camera to another guy and Dave let me put my arm around his shoulders and get my picture taken with him. Wheeeee!! I managed to snap a few photos as he was signing for other people, too, and I hope they all turned out good.

My main mission accomplished, I now had time to wander around and check out all the displays and merchandise, and to take as many pictures of costumed people as possible. There were at least three very good Darth Vaders walking around. It’s hard to pull off a good Vader impression unless the costume is perfect, so I was quite impressed with these. Also saw an excellent Darth Maul, with the makeup applied expertly and even the yellow contact lenses in place.

I bought a few things--some Vader pins and a T-shirt that glows in the dark--but I want to keep my collection under control so I resisted the urge to buy every cool thing in sight. Not that I didn’t have the money--I received a lovely tax refund of almost $750, so I could easily afford most of the stuff I wanted--but I dislike impulsive buying habits.

My feet were hurting, the punishment I deserved for wearing sexy black boots with three-inch heels, so I sat on a bench near a Jedi Starfighter that was on display near the food court. As I sat there, watching the people and feeling content in spite of my throbbing feet, a lady in her late 60s sat next to me. She said she was there with her son, who was signing up for the mini-marathon that was going to occur the next day, and she wondered why all these other people were here. I told her about the Star Wars Celebration, and she asked if I was from Indiana. I said I’d come from Cleveland, Ohio, and she was amazed that I’d come this far for a science-fiction event. I said that there were people from all over the country--I met someone from Wyoming--and from all over the world, which amazed her even more. Then she asked, “Well, why is Star Wars so popular? Why are all these people in costumes?” I must admit, I wasn’t sure how to answer that, except to say that it’s mainly a fad these days, that science-fiction is the big thing for many people and we like to celebrate it.

But really, what is the answer? It’s fun, of course, but that isn’t enough to explain why people will come so far to dress up in silly costumes and wait hours in line to attend these events. Judging by my own emotions at the time, I can honestly say that bonding has a lot to do with it. We’re all from vastly different backgrounds, with different personalities and different life experiences, but the one thing we share is our love of Star Wars. I could sit down and talk to anybody at all, or join a group of strangers at their table, and immediately feel welcomed as we babbled about our various Star Wars experiences and hobbies. That was probably the best part of the entire weekend--next to meeting Dave, of course!

Several of the crew from Nightly met up and we again went to Circle Center Mall for….well, I hate to call it food, but it was reasonably edible and didn’t immediately cause my stomach to hate me. It’s an American tradition for mall food to be the worst on the planet.

After that, we went to see Spider-Man. It was a good movie, very comic-bookish, but also with a decent plot and a romance interest. The main theme revolved around the choices Peter Parker makes as a self-appointed hero, and how they affect the people he loves. That’s quite a meaty concept for a comic book movie. The main appeal was getting to watch it in a theater that was jam-packed with Star Wars fans. Darth Maul sat behind me and Melinda, but by this time he had removed the yellow contact lenses. As the movie began playing, people cheered at familiar names, even of directors and producers. And of course, everyone boos the villains, cheers the heroes, and goes “Wooohooooo!!” at all the kissing scenes!

George Lucas is here! Well, not really, but a man who looks like him is here. He even wore a flannel shirt like George does! He graciously stood for photographs.

Great day all around, I’d say.

	This stormtrooper abandons tradition and opts for a cheery red armor suit! Nothing like being patriotic while you're shooting up Republicans! A Tusken Raider family--all dressed up and no-one to kill.

Saturday, May 4

I thought yesterday was crowded. I was wrong. The entrance line today is longer, the crowds are huger, the waiting interminable, the noise level higher. The thought occurs that the city planners could have done better at coordinating multiple events--the mini-marathon is being held today, simultaneously with the Celebration--which is okay, but EVERY road leading up to within half a mile of the convention center is blocked off to make way for the marathon route, so nobody could park close by! We had to walk three blocks to get here.

Once inside, the main lobby is shoulder-to-shoulder traffic, and that’s no exaggeration. I couldn’t even see where I was going (Oh, to be six feet tall at such times!) so I just shuffled along with the crowds until a clear space opened and I could once again make my way to the autograph section. I couldn’t help but think that we all bore an uncanny resemblance to cattle, milling around in front of the slaughterhouse chutes. MmooOOOOOooo!!

I arrived at Dave’s line at around 9:45 AM. Plenty of time, thought I, to get his autograph and then meet up with Melinda at 11:00 to go see Hayden Christiansen give his speech. (Oh, God, he is SOOOO hot!) Wrong! The line was huge! I think the only one that was longer was the one for Carrie Fisher--hers was longer than everyone else’s put together, naturally. Billy Dee Williams was next to Dave, and I think it was a close tie between his and Dave’s for the second-longest queue in the autograph section.

Anyway, I started at 9:45 and arrived at his table at after 11:00. “I’m back!” said I, and gave him my cool T-shirt to sign. He laughed and said, “I hate signing T-shirts--with a passion!” It is rather hard to write on the stretchy fabric. Just be glad I didn’t ask you to sign my leg, Dave! (He once signed the leg of a man who'd gotten a Darth Vader tattoo.)

By the time I got out of there, it was well after 11:00. I managed to find the appropriate queue--or mob, rather, since everyone was gathered at the foot of the stairs. I couldn’t see Melinda and assumed she’d already gone inside. I found out later that the first show had gone overtime and nobody was allowed to the upstairs ballroom until the first group came out.

I was so tired of waiting and my feet were aching because, once again, I’d chosen looks over comfort and wore my boots. Stupid. I rarely wear heels, so I’m not used to them, and to wear them two days in a row was pure madness. But, you know? I looked fantastic! So, I gave up on the Hayden thing, as much as I would’ve enjoyed seeing him and getting his photo (he wasn’t doing autographs).

Instead, I joined the line for a stage play entitled, “The Star Wars trilogy in 30 Minutes.” Took more than an hour of waiting to get in, and even then I just barely made it in as the last three or four rows were being filled up. However, it was well worth the wait. It’s been a long time since I laughed that hard! The actors are wearing simplified versions of the Star Wars costumes, with some of them playing double roles, such as the man who did both Vader (complete with breathing effects) and Chewbacca (complete with growly noises). Jabba was played by a very large, shirtless man with a Salacious Crumb puppet on his hand. The woman who played Leia used a flashlight for hologram effects; TIE fighters were guys running around the theater with plastic panels on their heads to simulate the TIE fighter wings; R2D2 was made from a white plastic garbage pail and carried around by the guy doing quite a good imitation of C3PO. The man playing Yoda did his voice even better than Frank Oz! These actors go all over the country and perform this play to sold-out audiences. If they’re ever in your area, go and see them! You won’t regret it.

George Lucas is now wearing his Rebel fighter pilot suit. I snap a few pictures of him and hope they turn out good.

I wanted to get into the Celebration Store to get some official merchandise, especially the Jorg Sacul action figure they were giving away. For those of you who don’t know, “Jorg” is George, and “Sacul” is Lucas spelled backwards. The figure is of a Rebel pilot in the orange fighter outfit, and when you remove the helmet, he has George Lucas’ face! Rather self-serving on George’s part, I think, but he’s one step above God now and can do anything he wants to. However, there was something like a two- to three-hour wait to get in, and by the time I got there, all the good stuff was gone. They had only a certain amount of merchandise to sell each day and once it was gone, you had to wait till the next day’s lot came in.

So, I never did buy anything there, but I did get a few odds and ends from the vendors, and I was quite happy. Got another T-shirt for me (a dragon using a can opener to remove a the armor off a hapless knight), and one for my brother (a Celtic wolf design).

My friends and I met up for lunch at a place called Hard Times. Got a burger and fries, which were good, but rather too much for me. As hungry as I was, I couldn’t eat much because of all the excitement.

Back at the Celebration, I was wandering about, looking for more Darth Vader-related stuff to buy that wouldn’t put me in the poorhouse because of its rarity, and I happened to spot an incredibly attractive Asian man with a fabulous body, sitting in his booth where he was doing custom drawings for people. I have a thing for handsome Asian guys, and this one has a sense of humor AND he’s an artist!! How perfect! I bought three dragon drawings from him. He does comic book artwork and has worked for Marvel, DC, and others. He’s REALLY good. I hung out there, we exchanged quips about the bust size of female superheroes, he explained how he’s not your stereotypical Asian because he can’t do math and is too tall and doesn’t even like rice, and I made up my mind to get back there again later.

I cannot believe how geeked-out I am about all this! I never considered myself such a Star Wars nut, but I'm actually enjoying being with all these weird people in their goofy costumes.

I heard rumors that over 25,000 people bought tickets for this event! No wonder it was so crowded. I bet the fire marshals were having a fit, checking every code to make sure we weren’t violating any rules by having so many people crammed into one building. The police must have been antsy, too, seeing people walking around with real gun holsters strapped to their costumes, even if the guns were only plastic blasters.

The line to see Carrie Fisher, I was told, was over SIX HOURS long!! Six hours for an autograph? I think not.

I find Number Six and Jedi Cool slumped against a pillar in exhaustion, looking as if they just wrestled a bear and lost. Two more victims of the Celebration‘s excitement. We sit on the floor for awhile, and Lace Mindu shows up; the two of us go into the theater where they’re showing all the Star Wars movies back-to-back. We don’t have time to see them all, as we’re planning to meet others for supper, but we do watch the first hour of The Empire Strikes Back. There’s nothing quite like watching a Star Wars movie in a theater full of Star Wars fanatics! It was such fun to yell and cheer together. Darth Vader always gets big applause, although not as much as Yoda. Yeah, I know. YODA?!? What the….?? When Vader choked to death yet another Imperial officer, I yelled, “DIE! DIE! DIIIEE!!” The guy sitting in front of me cracked up laughing. Creepy Girl, that’s me.



The Nightly Gang went out for a bite to eat at Steak ‘n’ Shake. I was still full from lunch, so I got only onion rings (greasy) and a chocolate shake (which was topped with that fake Cool Whip-type stuff instead of genuine whipped cream). Couldn’t even eat that much, which was probably just as well for my poor stomach. As we were finishing up our meals, suddenly Chewbacca walked in! He made the typical Chewie noises at everyone--I guess he had some kind of noisemaker strapped to his throat. As if on cue, a man in a Han Solo costume spotted him and walked in, yelling, “Always thinking with your stomach, as usual!” and they exchanged angry gestures, words, and growls with each other, until a Stormtrooper barged in and escorted them out of the restaurant. Then he turned to us and said, “It’s all over now. Nothing to see here!” It was hilarious, but I don’t think it was planned. It really did seem to be spontaneous. Isn’t that great? A Star Wars moment, right before our very eyes!

Sunday, May 5

It’s the last day! I’m anxious, because it IS the last day and I have to leave at around 2:30 to get my bus home. Lace isn’t staying for today’s events, so she takes me to the Greyhound station so I can store my luggage in one of their lockers, then drops me off at the end of the loooonnnng line.

The wait is dreadful, worse than all the other days, and some of us start discussing how this event could’ve been planned and organized much more efficiently by Wizards of the Coast, who arranged the whole thing. Handicapped people had it the worst, no doubt. I saw a lot of people in wheelchairs, a man with two artificial legs (who nevertheless was walking quite well), people on crutches….I stood in line with a man who had a spinal disease and should not have been on his feet for such long periods of time. I don’t think anybody would object to the elderly, the handicapped, and those with medical problems being directed to a separate line so they could get in faster.

There were many parents with young children, struggling to get through the crowds with strollers and baggage and cranky kids. A playroom would have been nice for these people, someplace they could drop off the kids while they go elsewhere. I suppose liability would be a big consideration, however. If someone’s child was injured or turned up missing, the legal ramifications would be horrendous.

The biggest problem for many of us was this: Those of us with memberships in the Star Wars Fan Club were supposed to have been granted special privileges, including getting in one hour early to shop at the Celebration Store and obtain autographs. I specifically renewed my membership for that very reason. However, there were so many thousands of members that there was no way we could all get in one hour early, because the wait was more than two hours long! People were lining up at four in the morning to get in, which was ridiculous. I really don’t know what the solution could have been. There were far too many people to coordinate early admission times. A better idea would be a 10% discount on all merchandise from the Celebration Store, or one free autograph coupon for every five that are bought--monetary privileges that can actually be enjoyed.

Anyway, I try to get in line for one last autograph from Dave (Me? Obsessed?), and the line ain’t goin’ nowhere. I mean, we’re basically standing still for an hour while various staff members in blue shirts try to figure out what to do about all the people. In fact, it’s hard to tell exactly WHERE Dave’s line is because so many people are milling around. Some are waiting for Billy Dee, others for Dave, some are trying to buy autograph coupons, most of us have no idea which line is which, everyone we ask gives us a different answer, everyone’s patience is running thin, and the poor staff all have desperate looks on their faces, as if they wish they could be anyplace else but here.

Eventually, someone yells, “Everyone who wants to see Dave Prowse, raise your hand!” About a million hands go up. Some attempt is made at forming separate queues, without too much success. A new aisle is roped off just for Dave’s fans. Then we do the shuffle-shuffle-stop-and-wait slow dance for awhile, as still more people line up behind us and we alternate between grumbling and laughing at the whole situation. All these actors must wonder about the mental health of people who are willing to endure such misery for the sake of a name scribbled on paper!

11:00 AM. Dave, Peter Mayhew, and Kenny Baker are all due to give their presentation at 11:30, so the whole line shuts down completely. I don’t want to miss this, so I run over to the 500 Ballroom, find a seat, and enjoy the one-hour show, which is given before a packed audience that extends out into the adjoining lobby. Standing room only--glad I was able to get a seat.



The introductions are given, and I don’t think Jesus Christ himself would receive more cheering and applause. These are the Three Big Stars of the films! Sure, Carrie Fisher had a big role, but she’s so huge a star that she’s basically unapproachable by anyone who isn’t a pope. Once all the cheering dies down, they can actually talk. They describe how they got their respective roles, how their lives have been affected by them, and relate some anecdotes. Peter is a very funny guy--I’d love to see him more often. Then people in the audience are invited to ask questions.

You think I’m passing up this opportunity? No freakin’ way! So I ask Dave about the book he has written, mainly so he’ll talk about it and everyone will realize that, yes, he does have a life outside of Star Wars. (Do I get a percentage of the profits for helping to publicize your book, Dave?) Also managed to get in a plug for his website--AND for me! “Ah, so YOU’RE Sable!” he said, again!

They took some more questions, told a few more stories (wish I could remember them all--maybe a transcript will be made available somewhere.), then it was time to head back for another autograph session. Well, of course, I had given up my place in line, and more people had joined in to get Dave’s autograph. There were signs at the coupon stands: “SOLD OUT for Dave Prowse, Billy Dee Williams, and Peter Mayhew.” Then they put up signs that they were sold out completely, which got a few people quite angry. There were some altercations involving yelling and a security guard and someone demanding to see someone in authority.
The waiting game again. The line goes nowhere and people complain, some of them not understanding that A.) it takes time for the actors to get from the Ballroom to the autograph section and B.) Dave is hobbling around on a crutch because of his hip problems and has got to be extremely tired and in a lot of pain by now, unless he’s taking enough painkillers to render a horse unconscious. How he makes it through one show after another, month after month, I’ll never know. I’m exhausted after three days, and I don’t have arthritis! At least I was smart enough to wear my comfortable shoes, a fact for which my feet are thanking me.

Later, the officials change their minds again and decide to sell off the remaining coupons, but not for the above-mentioned actors because their lines are just too long and they’d never get out of the building. So then there’s more confusion and questions and staff members trying to figure out the logistics of forming yet another line so people can get those few remaining coupons. NASA engineers are brought in to discuss the problem.

Carrie Fisher was sold out ages ago. One lady tells me that she waited EIGHT HOURS to get her autograph! Can you imagine?? The only way I’m waiting that long for an autograph is if it’s being signed by Bill Gates on a blank check, on which I can fill in the dollar amount. And we all know what the chances are of that happening.

The NASA guys throw up their hands in defeat, stating, unequivocally, that it is physically impossible to arrange this many people into any kind of coherent pattern. Chaos theoreticians are called in, but they refuse to contribute their assistance on the grounds that the laws of physics cannot be altered in the way that Celebration officials would like, regarding their desire to fit 2000 people into an area that’s meant for 300.

We do start moving a bit, eventually, but I know by now that there’s no way I’ll be able to get Dave’s autograph on this day. Besides, I already have two of them, PLUS I got to ask him a question and see him speaking on stage. Anyway, I think my showing up yet again would have made him nervous! I decide that I am content with what I have, and I get out of line and yell, “I have one coupon! Does anyone want to buy an autograph coupon?” Now, scalping--the practice of selling tickets at a higher-than-paid-for price--is legal in Indiana (or so I was told), so I could’ve asked more than the $15 I paid for it, and somebody probably would have been desperate enough to buy it. But I can’t take advantage of my fellow Star Wars fans, so of course I sell it at cost.

I have a little time left, so I go over to David Wong’s booth to chat. He recognizes me and says, “Hey, you’re back!” “Yes, I’m front, too,” I remark, which gets a laugh out of him. I buy one of his Darth Vader drawings (naturally) and also one of Yoda grinning as he annihilates Pikachu--I had to have that one! He has a website, which I shall definitely have to check out.

Then I ran to find some food, as it was now past two in the afternoon and I’d had nothing to eat at all due to standing around half the day. I grabbed a slice of pizza, ate it too fast for my own good, and split.

It was so sad, leaving the Celebration behind. I met a lot of wonderful, fun people. I saw fabulous costumes--although I missed the costume contest that was going on later that day. I spent some money, had more fun than I’ve ever had in my life, took four rolls of photos, and enjoyed everything in spite of my sore feet and the waiting and the crowds. Best of all, I got to finally meet Dave! I wish I could’ve talked with him a bit, but there was just never any time, with so many others waiting to see him. I guess I’ll get over it eventually. *sniff whimper*

In spite of the fun, though, I don't think I could have lasted another day. By Sunday, people were getting tired, impatient and short-tempered. The waiting was getting on everyone's nerves, including mine. It was time to go home.

The bus was late due to the fact that the driver somehow managed to put both rear wheels in a ditch and they had to call in an extra bus. Also, I was directed to the wrong line and ended up on a different bus that was going to Cleveland, but by a different route. There were other Star Wars fans there, too, as I could tell from the T-shirts and souvenirs. When I got to Columbus, I struck up a conversation with a girl who was going to Buffalo, NY. She’s an artist and stayed with a friend of her father. Her grandmother mailed her the $75 admission fee, saying that she couldn’t allow the world’s biggest Star Wars fan to miss out on this! We talked for quite awhile as we waited on the bus, comparing notes and discussing our experiences. It was great to talk to one more Celebration attendee before I finally got on the bus home. I got in at about 1:30 AM, never imagining I’d be so grateful to see this nasty city, called a cab home, and got to sleep around three. Ended up NOT going to work because there was no way I could work an eight-hour shift on four hours of sleep.

And that, my friends, is the story of my great Star Wars Celebration adventure. For those of you who couldn’t get there: You missed out on the experience of a lifetime. But it’s not too late, because there’s going to be Celebration 3, and you can start saving your money now for that! Don’t know if Dave will be there or not, with his arthritis giving him grief, but I know it will still be tremendous fun. I’ve already made up my mind that no matter where it is or what the circumstances, I’m going, even if I have to take an airplane to get there!

"They say the meek shall inherit because they stay up late and change the will." ~ Heywood Banks